Second Fiddle

Disclaimer: This post isn’t meant to male-bash or dumb down women

That said, why is it that women still hesitate or get embarrassed if they had a second marriages or in the midst of a divorce or suffer from ill health. And this hesitance even if they have made the second marriage a resounding success or moved on from a bitter divorce or worked past the ill-health.

In a corporate setup marital status, at least in most Indian companies, still plays an important role in how that person is perceived. Professionalism comes a second.

Being single means you are there for the co 24/7*365 vs being married=non-dependable. Not kidding, spoke to quite a few HR professionals and people in the senior rung, and these were exactly their thoughts.

I have been in professional/social situations where everybody is aware that a guy was going through a bad situation on the personal front-sick parents, custody fight, ugly divorce, etc. People around him were supportive and appreciated the fact that he turned up at work despite all these issues. If any offs or a short break was required it was granted without acrimony. In fact, at times, the management suggested these measures as they ‘valued’ his contribution.

Now flip the coin: when a woman faces a situation like this, and looks for empathy. The first challenge is getting her own sex to empathise with her situation. Most times, she has to put up with snide remarks and resentment if the management rallies around to provide her much-needed support.

What needs to change here????

PostscriptAn acquaintance, who was a divorcee, lost her job for not reciprocating her superior’s overture

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